Osho - The mind tends to discuss the defects of others. It helps the ego to feel good. Everybody is such a sinner; when everybody is such a sinner, comparatively one feels like a saint. When everybody is doing wrong, it feels good that "At least I am not doing that much wrong."
Hence people talk about others' defects; not only do they talk about them, they go on magnifying them. That's why there is so much joy in gossiping. When the gossip passes from one hand to another hand, it becomes richer. And when it passes back again, something will be added to it. By the evening, if you come to know the gossip that you started in the morning, you will be surprised. In the morning it was just a molehill, now it is a mountain. People are very creative, really creative and inventive.
Why are people so interested in gossiping about others, in finding
fault with others, in looking into others' loopholes and defects? Why
are people continuously trying to look through others' keyholes? The
reason is, this helps to give them a better feeling about themselves.
They become Peeping Toms, just to have a good feeling, "I am far
better." There is a motivation. It is not just to help others -- it is
not, whatsoever they say, notwithstanding what they say. The basic
reason is, "If others are very ugly, then I am beautiful." They are
following Albert Einstein's theory of relativity.
I have heard: Mulla Nasruddin was staying in a hotel. A telegram had
arrived from home and he was in a hurry to catch the train. He rushed.
But when he reached downstairs and looked at his luggage the umbrella
was missing. He had to go up to the room again and by the time he
reached the fourteenth floor the room had already been given to somebody
else -- a newlywed couple.
Although he was in a hurry and he might miss the train if he lingered there a little longer, the temptation was great. So he looked through the keyhole to see what was happening.
A newlywed couple -- they were also in a hurry, they had already
waited too long; the marriage ceremony and the church and the guests and
all that -- somehow they had got rid of all of them and they were lying
naked on the bed, talking sweet nothings. And the young man was saying
to the woman, "You have such beautiful eyes. I have never seen such
beautiful eyes! To whom do these eyes belong?"
And the woman said, "To you! To you, and only to you!"
And so on, the list went on. "These beautiful hands, these beautiful
breasts," and this and that -- this went on and on. And Mulla had
completely forgotten about the train and the taxi waiting downstairs.
But then suddenly he remembered his umbrella. When the list was about to
be completed, he said, "Wait! When you come to the yellow umbrella, that
belongs to me."
People are unconsciously doing many things. If they become conscious
these things will drop. Atisha says: Don't ponder over others' defects,
it is none of your business. Don't interfere in others' lives, it is
none of your business.
But there are great moralists whose whole work is to see who is doing wrong. Their whole life is wasted; they are like police dogs sniffing here and there. Their whole life's work is to know who is doing wrong.
Atisha says: That is an ugly trait and a sheer wastage of time and energy. Not only is it a wastage but it strengthens and gratifies the ego. And an ego more gratified becomes more of a barrier.
And remember, it is not only a question of not discussing others' defects. Don't even be too much concerned about your own defects. Take note, be aware, and let the matter be settled then and there. There are a few other people who brag about their own defects....
It is suspected by psychologists that Saint Augustine's autobiography, his confessions, are not true. He bragged about his defects. He was not that bad a person. But man is really unbelievable. If you start bragging about your qualities, then too, you go to extremes. If you start bragging about sins, then too, you go to the extreme. But in both ways you do only one thing.
What Saint Augustine is doing is simple. By bragging about his defects and sins and all kinds of ugly things, he is preparing a context. Out of such a hell he rose and became a great saint. Now his saintliness looks far more significant than it would have looked if he had been simply a good person from the very beginning.
And the same is the case with Mahatma Gandhi in India. In his autobiography he simply exaggerates about his defects and goes on talking about them. It helps him in a very vicarious way. He was so low, he was in such a seventh hell, and from there he started rising and became a great mahatma, a great saint. The journey was very arduous. This is very ego-fulfilling.
Don't discuss others' defects, don't discuss your own defects. Take note, and that is that. Atisha says awareness is enough, nothing else is needed. If you are fully aware of anything, the fire of awareness burns it. There is no need for any other remedy.
Source - Osho Book "The Book of Wisdom"
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